Selah 

  
#nofilter

Genesis 2:1-3:Thus the heavens and the earth were completed in all their vast array. By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work. Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done.
So grateful for a long weekend. A getaway from school. Grateful that I did not stay in my room doing homework or trying to study. I actually managed to forget about homework, not worry, and just let go. I need that peace everyday! *note to self* Thankful that I had the chance to be with people whom I’ve barely known for a year – but feel like family already. I honestly do not know how God is this generous. Days like these don’t come often, but I know that I can look back and remind myself of God’s goodness.

Well. School really starts now. Test,s quizzes and what nots. Yet. I am eternally grateful to be called higher, to depend more and more on His strength. 

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when the going gets tough

“Someone asked me recently how to do something she thought was going to be difficult, in this case recording an audio book, and I suggested she pretend that she was someone who could do it. Not pretend to do it, but pretend she was someone who could. She put up a notice to this effect on the studio wall, and she said it helped.

So be wise, because the world needs more wisdom, and if you cannot be wise, pretend to be someone who is wise, and then just behave like they would.

And now go, and make interesting mistakes, make amazing mistakes, make glorious and fantastic mistakes. Break rules. Leave the world more interesting for your being here. Make good art.

Neil Gaiman inspires me to keep trying no matter what I think of myself.

Thoughts

let me tell you a story.

This past week has been so difficult for me because I’ve had to face things no girl should ever face. Okay fine, this may sound melodramatic, I’ll stop.

But let me tell you, before I start, that if you can relate to this, you should know that you can come to a place that is set higher and chose to speak life and peace into your circumstances.

So, a friend told me that I could live with her for the summer. It wasn’t till later on that I found out that the person will not be in town till a week or so after my contract ended. Ok, so whatever, cause someone offered me their couch. And that was enough. Somehow deep inside I had a feeling that it wouldn’t work out. And so Sunday came along, I had no place to go. I called my cell leader just hours before, explained my situation and she said I could stay. So that was that. 

I’ve been trying to call the person to see if I still could live with her for the rest of the summer. But somehow I just felt like, meh. It didn’t work out, why should I keep trying. I was upset already. Because let me tell you something:

Being homeless sucks. Depending on others sucks. Relying on someone else (other than family) it’s not cool. Always asking for rides and favours you know you cannot repay. 

To be honest I wasn’t even pms-ing. I guess the feeling of not having a place to stay in a foreign land really got to me. I don’t even know why.. But whatever the excuse, I was sad. Feeling so let down. Not cool I tell you. On top of that I kept missing Skype or FaceTime dates. 

Let me where I am at now. This past Sunday I went out for prayers, and whatever pride I had I didn’t care. I just went out and told my frustrations, basically how I wished I was home – and things would be less complicated. I literally bawled. Which was a little bit embarrassing but no pride hey. Through that prayer, I felt my heavy heart slowly becoming lighter and lighter. By the time I got back to my seat I was so light. I felt free and it has been quite some time since I felt that way.

To be honest, I purposed in my heart to forgive, forget and let it be the past. But honestly, let me be frank and tell you that my initial trust can never be restored. I guess I really just need Jesus to teach me how to trust and start new again. 
I mean one step at a time? I am so grateful that I got to a point where I can look at the situation from a higher point. I am blessed to be able to stand on a rock that is higher than I. I pray with all my heart that I will be able to be genuine and loving and just so forgiving in future circumstances.
Here’s to new family and learning to grow!

Summer livin

i have a tonne of things to check of my to-do list,

But all I can do right now is just sit here, listen to Sleeping at Last aka emo music, stare out into the night and think of how cool it would be if I could be in AZ.
Ah that life of disappointment is a stranger to me now.

Because if you learn to rely on the One that never fails – life will never be a disappointment.

Grateful for alone time and grateful for my best best Friend who follows me wherever I go.
Remember that, Eugenia.

July?

It’s 1131pm and I have an exam tomorrow. But. I am so thankful and grateful. My heart is so full.

So, my Friday/Saturday has been super productive. Somehow all my plans were cancelled and I got to study so much.

Then, I went to a friend’s farewell party and it was way out in the estates. It was nice to get away for an evening – and seeing how much these people have impacted the community is just amazing.

But that’s another goodbye/invitation to Korea!

Anyway. Church was good. Chilled a little and I planned a little get together for Matt (who’s leaving on Wednesday). The turn up was amazing, the whole house was full! We all had 2/3 rounds of Bang! The board game.

And my dream! My dream of seeing internationals and the locals getting along like this! Wowow! I’m so so so glad.

Also, I got to spend time with Hanny + a really good conversation while she was driving home to Tulsa.

With that being said, thanks Jesus for good times, and help us thank you for the bad times too!
Here’s to 5 days of classes left!!!

What a relaxed weekend despite spending so much time studying.
I’ve been speaking truth and really trying to acquire a new mindset. Good vibes from Jaymes Young playing now and ah, I’ve been fed so well this week.
Jesus is good, Jesus is sorta amazing and pretty cool. I think I like Him, yep I do.

worst/best

today was that kinda day.

Woke up in the morning and I got breakfast – cereal. A good start cause I had food. Anyway, I was scared I would not pay attention in class since I slept so late but surprisingly I did. And Ms. Ingram let us out early.

Lunch – 12 hours since I put my phone in the rice bag. It got wet from the rain the other day 😦 It still didn’t work (just the speakers).

Then, I went to walmart and bought fruits aka lifesavers. Came back and went to the gym. This Irish professor played squash with me and it was the best workout I had in ages – literally made my day and reminded me how much I loved squash/sweating. We are planning to play badminton soon – he invited me to play with the student club so we will see (most of the club members are asians lol). Anyway, Jose did his pre lab with me and we both sent it on time lol.

The best part was that I beat him in pool. For the first time ever. You know. That feeling. And that’s not it, I checked my phone, and it is not considered tagged for water damage. At least that was what I could see.

So, its all good now. And I’m so thankful to Jesus for being a part of my day, keeping me awake, allowing someone to play squash with me (and even coach me!), helping me do my lab and stuff. Ah ok. Thank you for fast-paced classes where I can always remember who is carrying me through it all.

Till then.